(I think I was on the “what after kensho?” kick for a while longer and might find some more tweets about it.)
selflathing
lately been wondering what comes after subtractive practice. dismantle your old scripts, kensho, etc: tada.wav 🎉! then what? you’re only halfway, need to rebuild. where’s the guidance?
“chop wood carry water” is crumbs; do we seriously send people along with a “congrats you saw Reality glhf”, or did i miss a memo?
possible answer: the eightfold path applies just as well afterwards, too
NOTE: “this thread” below references similarities between sex and enlightenment.
selflathing> this thread is very clearly me talking about myself, so i’ll pick up here.
i've been grinding on this "what next after kensho?" question for roughly a year.
Q: well, what is it i want from "next"?
A: i want to stop having to look. it's so, so tiring.
https://t.co/9hEecHCxPe
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of course. of COURSE. i searched for so long, i had the experience, and for a while
i was elated: i'd found what i was looking for, i was free of the search + simply
able to be
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this "what next?" question is the searching again. the first time, i found what i
was looking for the moment i truly gave up the search. so now my ego can try
"pretending to give up the search", hoping to fool the universe
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and of course: my old Soto teacher told me this, the first time i brought it up.
"the searching is a habit. you've found the thing, no need for it any more" - but i
dismissed it. not satisfying. needed something M O R E
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but the answer to "i want to stop having to look" is "okay then, stop looking".
what am i even looking FOR? i say vague things like "integration" without knowing
what i mean by that. meanwhile i keep saying i'm skeptical of people who claim to
easily access a no-self state...
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ok. so what do i want NOW? i think it's to spend more of my time in present moment
awareness. more time here, less time in ego ego think think brain mode. ironically,
this puts me right back at the beginning: attention practice! how poetic :)
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